2006 Mercedes-Benz CLS 55 AMG Illinois

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Finally - an open straight.

Anxious to relieve ourselves of the four poorly driven, ill-handling vehicles we’d been imprisoned behind for the last three miles of achingly beautiful (but impossible to see around) curves, foot reintroduces itself to floor and a rolling cacophony of sound that would absolutely convince Bill Lester that someone had stolen his Craftsman Series NASCAR ride immediately shreds the air behind us.

Diving into the opposing lane, we are treated to an inkling of what it must feel like inside the Space Shuttle at launch. Seats pressed firmly into our backs, we whip forward as our velocity increases logarithmically. The first car in the line is behind us in less than the blink of an eye.

Normally we’d content ourselves to pick them off one or two at a time, but we’re by the first one so easily, the lane ahead is still wide open, and the acceleration is continuing ferociously. Our car greedily hunkers down as it endeavors to satiate its inane desire to utterly devour distance.

And excuse us for saying so, but this is feeling really, really good.

Virtually erasing the next two cars, we rapidly approach the front of the line where the possession of a Northstar V8 convinces the lead driver to take it upon himself to attempt to subvert our passage. Yellowish-gray puffs of smoke emit from his tailpipes as he violently urges his mount to deliver more momentum – and it does - in vain. Assaulted by the tsunami-like waves of torn atmosphere erupting from our wake, he has barely a moment to register the chromed inscription just below the ducktail spoiler gracing our trunklid.

CLS 55A…M…G.

Chuckling at his folly, we disappear forever around the next curve, leaving behind sobering humiliation to settle heavily into the interior of his car.

Perhaps it was the graceful lines of the Mercedes that falsely convinced the poor guy he had a shot at taking us. Given the fact that there hasn’t been a whole lot of publicity about the CLS Mercedes, he could possibly be forgiven for thinking he had a chance.

But frankly, a supercharged 5.5-liter V8 delivering 469 horsepower and 516 foot-pounds of torque will humiliate just about anything (and anybody) on the road.

The CLS is quite beautiful. Its flowing arcs give the impression of motion, even when the car is at rest. Mercedes calls the car a four-door coupe, and indeed if you squint, the side appearance is somewhat coupe-like. The front end leaves a bit to be desired to our eye, the headlamp treatment isn’t quite integrated. But overall the package bodes very well for the look of upcoming models to wear the three-pointed star.

In addition to beauty, luxury is delivered in heaping proportions as well. Mercedes’ dynamic seats actually inflate their side bolsters individually in response to cornering forces to help you remain upright during the extreme maneuvers this car is capable of. Incidentally, those seats are heated and ventilated as well.

Active cruise control gives you set and forget capability on long highway runs and adaptive headlights illuminate the road going into your turns when darkness is a factor. Interior mood lighting enhances the cabin ambiance at night and the navigation system ensures you’ll never want for guidance when in unfamiliar surroundings. The seven CD audio system will accept the output of your iPod or any other portable device and is reinforced with Harmon-Kardon’s L7 surround technology, placing you in the studio amidst your favorite musicians. Satellite radio is available as well.

Ride comfort is guaranteed by Mercedes AirMatic suspension system. This same suspension also delivers extraordinary handling as it keeps the car absolutely flat when cornering. There is no body roll whatsoever; the car simply changes direction. Extremely accurate speed-sensitive steering is light at low speeds and firm at high speeds providing great feel, regardless of the circumstances.

All of this, in combination with huge 19-inch tires and wheels, strongly complemented by 14-inch cross drilled and ventilated discs up front and similarly configured 13-inch discs in the rear, give the CLS 55 AMG the ability to corner and stop in equal measure to its propensity for acceleration.

Of course the real star is the engine. A belt-driven Lysholm screw-type supercharger force-feeds the eight hand installed pistons through an air to water intercooler, delivering enough power to bitch-slap the car from 0 to 60 in just over four seconds.

The five-speed automatic transmission is equipped with gearshift buttons on the steering wheel to allow you to control it manually. AMG SpeedShift technology forces the automatic to behave exactly like a manual transmission, holding shifts all the way up to redline until you ask for them. You also have a choice of two automatic shift programs, comfort and sport.

The suspension system is similarly adjustable through three ranges - comfort, sport one and sport two - with sport two being the most aggressive setting. Automatic leveling keeps the car at an even keel when the trunk is heavily loaded. The suspension contracts at speed to achieve better aerodynamics and can also be raised at the touch of a button when negotiating steep driveways or rougher road surfaces.

If you have the means, there’s a whole lot of worse stuff you can do with $97,000 than put one of these in your driveway. The CLS 55 AMG is fast, good looking, extremely prestigious and very satisfying to drive.

Creature comforts abound and the vehicle bristles with new technology. Unfortunately, in our test car, that was something of an Achilles heel. Much has been written of late about Mercedes-Benz and its struggle with quality, chiefly owing to the failure of many of the new electronic systems in its cars these days.

Based on our experience with the CLS 55, a bit more remains to be written. We were apprised of no fewer than three defects by the driver information center in the tachometer of our CLS 55. The active cruise control failed, we were warned that the ESP was inoperable – although we felt it kick in a couple of times during our more exuberant moments behind the wheel - and the adaptive headlamps refused to swivel in sympathy with the steering wheel.

All that in a car that had less than 5,000 miles on the odometer is pretty troubling. Not to mention bound to be expensive once the warranty plays out. We suppose it can be argued that if one can afford to spend 97 grand to get the car (the as tested price), upkeep shouldn’t be a major problem.

But being without the Mercedes while it is in the shop is a problem. After all, it’s a pretty time-worn, extremely tired cliché – one usually uttered by somebody frontin’ …

“We’ll have to take your car tonight baby, my Benz is in the shop...”

Specifications:
Base MSRP: $87,375
Engine: Supercharged, 5.4 liter V8
Transmission: Five-speed automatic with manual shift
Horsepower: 469 @ 6,100 rpm
Torque: 516 foot-pounds from 2,650 to 4,500 rpm
Drivetrain: Front-engine/rear drive
Fuel Economy: 14 –city / 20 highway