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Divorce mediation has grown both inside and outside the courthouse for many reasons. Client satisfaction is a major factor. Just as the Japanese auto makers virtually captured the US auto market because they built better products geared to consumer needs, the traditional adversarial family lawyer is facing a similar consumer revolution. Some of the benefits of mediation are discussed below.
- More control over the process
- Save money
- Privacy
- Faster and less time-consuming
- More effective communication
More control over the process
People are learning what lawyers have long realized - fewer than one out of ten cases are solved by a judge. Settlement is much more common than trials. Despite the prevalence of settlement, the court system and much lawyering are built around an adversarial mindset that permeates attitudes, habits, and institutional supports. Lawyers are increasingly working with their clients to keep control and not surrender decision making to a third person until all reasonable efforts to settle the matter have been exhausted. If the parties can settle a problem with one phone call, nothing more needs to be done. If one short phone call won't do it, perhaps a second (or third) longer call may be necessary. If the matter remains unresolved, perhaps a meeting over a cup of coffee will settle it. If not, the next step might be writing a letter(s) either to resolve or to defer a resolution of the problem. These steps may be taken with or without the guidance of a lawyer.
Save money
Once couples learn about divorce mediation, they often want to try it solely to save money. To determine the extent of cost savings (if any) in a particular case, your lawyer and you must consider the nature of the issues, the emotional and communicational dynamics involved, the use of lawyers and other experts in the process, the timing of the mediation, the cost of the mediators(s) selected, and the process being used. Such a discussion must also compare mediation with costs incurred in both litigation and direct negotiation.
Privacy
People treat financial strains or career disasters as private concerns, as are emotional and social troubles of family members. So it is natural for divorcing couples to be fearful of how outsiders will react to their breakup. Many even stay in arid, unhappy, or abusive marriages out of fear that family problems will become public gossip.
Divorce allegations written or spoken in court almost always become part of the official record and are accessible by the public. Most states require a filing in the public court system to obtain a divorce or enforceable orders, so divorcing parties are forced by law to announce their family troubles publicly.
In many states, the opportunity to seal court records is limited, making every document filed in court available in perpetuity for inspection by any member of the public (plus press and television), including the children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren of the divorcing couple. Testimony concerning illegal or immoral acts, financial manipulation, career success or failure, or emotional well-being are remembered.
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